Respond To Your Mistakes In A Way That Builds Your Reputation
You Can't Fix Problems Successfully If Your Ego Leads The Way
I was recently in an assembly with grade school children and the presenter did the old “raise your hand if you’ve ever made a mistake” bit so the kids could see that even adults get things wrong from time to time. It’s a good bit. Kids need to know that mistakes happen and more importantly they need to know how best to clean them up. With a five year old at home who from time to time carries a toolbox around the house, we use the language of “fixing your mistakes”. He’s getting there…he’s sharpening his tools…but what really gets me is how AWFUL SO MANY ADULTS ARE at this piece of the puzzle. My son is 20 years away from a fully developed brain…we…are not. This shouldn’t be a problem for adults, especially those in leadership positions.
So why is this so hard for people? As is typical in most bad decisions, people allow their objectives to get “mis-prioritized”. Ego fires up the defenses and people fail because they aim to protect the “self” in the short term rather than the relationship for the long term. People armor up when they need to open up.
SCOTT GALLOWAY’S 3 STEPS:
Scott Galloway is a professor of marketing at NYU who is also an award winning author, podcast host, and entrepreneur. On the issue of business crisis management he outlines three steps that companies need to follow to handle any major issues. His discussion revolves around business leadership but the principles hold true for real estate investment and management and personal issues as well.
STEP 1. ACKNOWLEDGE THE ISSUE:
There is very little that is more frustrating than when a responsible party fails to own what has happened or tries to downplay it at all costs. Deflecting the issue and trying to place blame are short term strategies that always catch up to you while also damaging your reputation and authority. You lose trust. You lose your people.
In business, this is a must. In politics, denial and deflection often works better than it should (and maybe that’s part of why business leaders go that route). But in business, and in life, there isn’t a next story knocking your screw up off the front page. You need to own it as soon as possible so you can stop its tentacles from growing. Cut it off at the roots as soon as you can. Follow up a loss with an instant win so you yourself can turn that front page with a headline of your choosing.
Galloway references the Chicago Tylenol murders of 1982 as a perfect case in point. In September of that year, 7 people were killed by Tylenol gel capsules that were laced with lethal doses of cyanide. The country was in a tizzy as people from coast-to-coast wondered if their medicine cabinets were filled with poison. Rather than spin their wheels on how this could have happened, the manufacturers (McNeil Consumer Products/Johnson & Johnson) immediately recalled 31 million bottles of Tylenol and offered to replace any bottles people had already bought. In the short-term, this undoubtedly cost the company many millions of dollars and their name was dragged through the mud, but in the long run the company effectively restored faith in the brand by owning it and forcing the story to pivot. They became a model for the pharmaceutical world.
STEP 2. THE RESPONSE HAS TO COME FROM THE TOP PERSON:
Not only do you need to act quickly and accept responsibility, but it has to come from as high up the ladder as possible. For the same reason as above…not admitting fault and/or sending a lesser team member to bite the bullet is weaselly…and ineffective. It’s like sending a sincere apology via text message. Poor form yielding poor results…and you look weaker than you did at the onset.
I’ve seen groups where the head person lacked this instinct but the number two or number three would routinely step in to stop the bleeding. Right move…wrong person…wrong results.
STEP 3. OVERREACT (OVER RESPOND):
Simply put, the reaction and response needs to be big. You misplaced the two boxes of Thin Mints your neighbor ordered from your daughter?…Mr. Wilson should get 4 boxes ASAP and next year’s order is free. Your reliability and reputation are worth it. Your relationship and your brand are about much more than cookies. The story changes from you being careless to you being remarkable…and that second story, which you now control, is more likely to travel.
To return to the school setting, it’s all too common to see young people pushed toward empty apologies by well-meaning adults but we’re misplacing the focus. Apologizing and taking ownership is a good intro, but it’s powerless and ultimately worthless unless you can then show how you plan to repair the relationship. And that is the goal…it’s the relationship between two parties…which is impossible to see if you’re stuck worrying about yourself.
MUCH TO MY CHAGRIN:
As loyal readers and friends may recall, my wife and I throw a sizeable 4th of July Party each summer. This year our DJ couldn’t make it but he was generous enough to lend his professional equipment. I was a little tentative, knowing that our bunch can get a little rowdy, but I accepted, got the 5 minute tutorial upon delivery, and the party went off without a hitch…until I returned the equipment. Apparently, I broke the microphone to the point it was in multiple pieces? Uhh….oh…
“I didn’t do that! Who the hell did?”
“How did this happen? Who was using it at the end of the night?”
“When did it happen? Are you sure it wasn’t broken already?”
…who cares?…none of those details mattered and none of those questions were worth thinking because none of them would impact the actions I had to take. It was my responsibility and I had to own it as the top person. I had to apologize and take steps to remedy the problem and relationship in a way that showed my remorse, despite the fact I had no idea who broke the microphone. In terms of “overreacting” and paying back big, it wasn’t as if replacing it with multiple microphones, or a more expensive microphone made a lot of sense…but where added expense isn’t an option to back your apology and show your sincerity, time usually can be. My version of overreaction was to order the replacement mic and have it on its way to the DJ’s doorstep before I even responded to his initial complaint. I didn’t armor up. I still don’t know how the microphone broke. And in truth, as much as this tale might seem like the potential impetus to this little rant, I’d totally forgotten all about it until moments ago when searching my memory for an example…why?…because it was handled right and it became inconsequential. Trust was restored to the point that it practically never happened.
Don’t armor up. Own mistakes and rebuild with the goal of strengthening the relationship that has been strained. That’s how you win. That’s how your reputation grows and you establish your brand. And if need be, that’s how you can feed your ego…it just has to wait its turn.
Notes:
https://www.profgalloway.com
https://www.pbs.org/newshour/health/tylenol-murders-1982
Photo Credit: www.chainsawjournal.com
You lose trust. You lose your people.!! And, thanks for the MICROPHONE BRO!!! =)